A Thousand Words Thursday.... "I'm Not Saying I'm Clairvoyant" Edition

Seems I may have a little Nostradamus in me after all... Or, at least I'm off to a good start. (Also- Awesome New BFF would totally let me plan the wedding, 'coz she's awesome like that!!)

Them There Eyes....

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As Promised: The Gory Details of Our Last Two Weeks

It went a little something like this:

  Firstly, a late night wake up of a certain little girl, a week ago Monday, that included- but was not limited to, a high fever,  quite a bit of moaning and the start of what would be 2 full weeks of a full-color spectrum of diarrhea (every. two. hours.)  

  Secondly, a Tuesday comprised of an even higher fever coupled with a VERY pathetic baby, who was completely unable (or unwilling) to eat.  Every piece-of-shit thermometer in the house was employed to try to put a number to the steaming pile of magma that was my daughter's tiny body (hmmm... crappy-strip-of-plastic-forehead-thermometer reads 98 degrees [fail, this burn that I'm feeling is definitely not normal], useless-hunk-of-turd-ear-thermometer reads 95 degrees [wrong. again.  the kid is on fire!], horribly-misshapen-fake-binky-thermometer reads 'err' [because what kid will actually entertain the idea of using this poor excuse for a pacifier- especially when sick!]  and the really-are-you-kidding-me-flimsy-plastic-digital-thermometer thrust deep into the axillary only got up to 103.1 before the screaming, overtired, ball of sick squirmed away)*.   The pediatrician was consulted and I was told not to be too concerned unless the temperature peaked higher than 104 (and I'm supposed to know this how, exactly!?!) or if she becomes lethargic.  A follow up appointment was made for the next day.

  Nextly, Wednesday seemed slightly less scary, as her fever broke and the diarrhea seemed to be lessening (and by "lessening" what I actually mean is "arriving in intervals of every 4 hours instead of every 2").  This resulted in a cancellation of the above mentioned appointment (FAIL!) and, wait for it.... oh yea... a 7pm jaunt out to the emergency room.  Right before bedtime- Sofs had a particularly colorful (see also: RED, or BLOODY) stool which, needless to say freaked-my-freak!  So with jammies on, scary diaper in tow, and blanky in-hand we headed out the door, to what I was certain would be a LONG. NIGHT.  p.s. I was right about the long night.

Also-ly, Long ER story, short... we arrived, were quickly whisked off to the Pediatric Emergency Department (oh-la-la) and were seen by no less than 9 nurses, 4 (actual) doctors and 5 technicians.  Six different individuals examined the lovely soiled diaper that I brought along, and many, many, scary freaking tests were ordered.  My poor little baby endured a urine collection (NOT. FUN!) an abdominal ultrasound (longest ultrasound in all existence) and a chest x-ray (which, to hear Sofie tell it, must have been something like laying on a bed of nails and having someone literally reach inside to take a peek).  The poo from the diaper was sampled and we hung around long enough to have a few yucky diagnoses ruled-out.  We were discharged and sent home armed with no more information than we arrived with, but at least we got a free Gatorade out of the 6 hour ordeal!  We were told to follow up with the pediatrician and await the results of the poo culture.

Subsequently, Sofie has started to feel better (albeit, slowly) and we came to learn, last friday the results of the stool culture.  Are you sitting down?  Maybe you'd like to take a moment to locate the hand sanitizer.... 

The culprit:  Salmonella!  #GAG!  YACK!  EWWWW...

We think we've narrowed down the source to a plate of eggs eaten at one of our favorite little breakfast joints.  Needless to say we'll be eating our eggs, hard-cooked, from home for a while.  

Anyway- the prognosis is good and Sofs seems to be back to her normal spunky self.  Nothing to worry about and no harm done.  We will be seeing the Pediatrician every two weeks until the bacteria is fully eliminated from her system (and washing/sanitizing the bloody hell out of everything. everywhere. forever. ewww.)  

*I am, for the record, acutely aware that a 'rectal' is the only accurate measure of temperature in babies- but I was not [I REPEAT: NOT!] going in there, under these particular circumstances

The Secret Ingredient

With raised eyebrows, many people begrudgingly congratulated Patton and me on our pregnancy and the impending birth of our second child.  They also felt it necessary to let us know that having children so close together was going to be, well... "A NIGHTMARE AND TOO HARD! OMG WHATAREYOUTHINKING!! ( ...I am, of course, paraphrasing.)

Anyway,  some of the more subtile concerns for our welfare included (but were not limited to): Two babies with bottles in diapers, Not enough time to spend with either, SLEEP!, The older won't be able to "help-out" with the younger, etc etc... 

WELL!  We'll show you, Naysayers!! Turns out that last one was way off.  I've got more help than I could ever have imagined :)  ThankYouVeryMuch!

Other than the occasional "bring that to mama." request, I don't really ask for much in the way of help from Sofs.  But, this incredibly perceptive and HELPFUL  little girl has been picking up on some of the very subtile details of the day-to-day routine, and offering assistance in a way that only a 16 month-old can.  For example: 

1. When the baby cries- She goes to him.  If he's within reach, she will try to offer him the binky, or a kiss or give him a gentle pat on the tummy.  
   
2. When the baby's swing stops- She gives him a little push.  She'll also start the music for him (wether he's around to hear it or not).
   
3. When the baby's mouth is open- She puts a Cheerio (or sippy cup of juice, or hunk of cheese...) in.
4. When the baby's eyes are closed- She sticks a finger in it to make sure it's still there.
5. When the baby gets his diaper changed- she takes care of the dirty diap for me.  

So Helpful...  in the horseshoes and hand-grenades kind of way.  

I mean, I can't get over how adorable it is that she came out of the kitchen clapping as if to say, "I did it.  You're Welcome!"  And I also can't get over how glad I am that I realized the diaper was missing and NOT in the trashcan.  It did not take me long to realize that to a baby, one cupboard is the same as the next, because WOOHOO!  Prize in the baking cabinet!  

So sweet.  These are the moments that I'm really glad I had our babies close together.  Because, if I had a 4 year old shoving dirty diapers in with the Bisquick, I'd be less than entertained.

A quick post about baby heads....

Of course, baby heads are all round and squishy and perfectly ripe for smooching.  Of course, baby heads smell all sweet&delicious, and have that awesome fuzzy hair that tickles your nose.  And of course, baby heads are seriously pissing me off lately!  Don't mis-read, I love my babies and their adorable little faces, the puffy little cheeks and what-not.... but the baby heads are on notice.

Here's what I'm up against: 

It's the scalp mostly.  Cradle-cap more specifically.  And horrible thin wispy baby hair.  I mean what's a mom to do?

So, I've been battling the daemon called cradle-cap for a full 16 months.  This nasty, scaly, fungus-of-the-head, that is persistent as all get out.  Trying to be a good, and natural, mom, I patiently waited for it to pack it's bags and get the hell out of dodge, but it wouldn't.  I started slathering Sof's poor head in oils of all sorts, but to no avail.  I even pulled out the baby dandruff shampoos, in hopes of not needing to use the horrible, chemical-ladened cradle-cap remover, but again, it wouldn't budge.  Finally, last week I broke down and doused her head in toxic "Gentle Natural Cradle Cap Care" (natural my ass- where, exactly, does one find 'Tocopheryl Acetate" in nature) and just like that the cap has been removed.  I'm, a little bit, kicking myself for waiting so long to use this junk, but boy am I relieved to see it go.  

And, just as I really found the groove in my victory dance- guess what... it's not gone at all.... the cradle-cap just switched kids.  So now, I've got ANOTHER tiny-widdle, fragile, baby with disgusting scaly lizard head.  ARRGgggggg... and the new dilemma, Do I just suck it up and get rid of the stuff, or do I give Carter the same natural treatments I gave Sofie until he's older and I'm more sick of this stuff!?!  yuck.

Anyway, the other baby-head issue is an even harder one.  There's no toxic potion to cure crappy thin hair.  My poor little girl has the worst hair ever.  I'm still holding out hope that it will, one day, just magically turn into the georgeous flowing locks that I dreamed she'd have- but that seems like the utter definition of a long shot. Maybe now that the cradle-crap (... I mean 'cap') is gone her scalp can breathe, and the hair follicles will come to life... or maybe not. 

Oh well, I guess she needed some mortal trait :)