Ketchup, No. Catsup, No. Catch-up. There it is...

I have totally slacked off this last week with the posting.  So, here you will find my lame-ass attempt to turn my homework in late for reduced credit, play catch up by compiling 5 days worth of stuff into one disjointed post.

Days 15-20 of the 25 days: I promise, it's almost over!

So, where did I leave off- ah, yes.  The boy's birthday party.  It was wonderful. I still have not gotten around to the thank you notes (they're on the list, I swear!) but, it was lovely.  Then came the craziest of all crazy weeks- it went a little something like this:

Day 15: Recovered from the birthday party (and all it's assorted madness) and then finished up (RIGHT!- I think the force of that lie just caused a blood vessel in my head to explode!) my Christmas shopping.  That right there, Christmas shopping, is ridiculous!  Seriously.  Why do we do this to ourselves- every.year.  You think that as a species, we'd evolve.  erggg.  (that's right- you'll find me out- tomorrow- finishing up (!@$#@$) the Christmas shopping.  In the 85 feet of snow that was dumped over my house this weekend. for fun.)

Day 16: Carter's real birthday.  Part of the reason for my severe procrastination in blogging this week was due to the overwhelmingly sentimental post that I *wanted* to dedicate to my boy on his very first birthday.   I spent the better part of two days, dreaming up eloquent prose* that would serve to excuse (at least a little bit of) my regular, snarky jabs toward my youngest.  Instead, I made the hubbs take us out to dinner.  And I ate like it was MY birthday- because, well because I made him, and that counts!

*Turns out that I'm even worse at 'eloquent prose' than I am at all this other babble, so, yeah. didn't happen.  SHOCKER!

Day 17:  Hold on to your panties, ladies.  On Day 17, mama had herself a date night.  Now, before you go getting all excited about Patton and I hitting the town- I should tell you, upfront, he was not invited.  This date night was all about the "Awesome new BFF" and I getting out, sans babies and hitting the town (and hit it we did!  matter-of-fact: we smacked that town square in her pretty little face!).  We've known each other now SIX MONTHS (I know, and she keeps coming around- poor thing!) and this was our first opportunity to speak both in full sentences and without spelling out the naughty words.  Oh, and wine....and gin and tonics (mee too!)...but we do that at all our play-dates- It's a two drink minimum around here!
I digress-  We went out, ate some great food, divulged all our dirty little secrets, and NOT ONCE did we talk about the babies.  We just took mommy-dating to a whole new level.

Day 18: I nursed the first hangover I've had in, what feels like, years.  Then I rallied for yet another company holiday party.  "yea."-said in complete and utter monotone. But this one, much like the last one, was far better than I could have anticipated.  Wanna know why?  Gonna tell you- we won stuff at this one too!  Someone needs to send us lotto tickets or something- we are on FIRE lately!  Seriously- this is just too shitty to even say.... in the company raffle, Patton and I won a Wii.  I know, right?!?!  We really are not this lucky. ever.
(Totally unrelated side-note: I feakin' love Wii boxing!)* Re.Diculous.

*Dear FCC, I was not paid for this endorsement.  No part of Nintendo or their overpriced gaming company has compensated me in anyway.  In fact, 48 hours ago- I would have laughed in the face of anyone accusing me of paying $50 for a video game.  Tomorrow, however is a TOTALLY different story.  Sincerely, C.

Day 19:  The sky fell in -or- Welcome to the Snowpocalypse -or- snOMG 2009!
Here in the greater DC metro area, the magical machine in the sky that keeps all order and balance in the world broke.  alot.  and it snowed.  a-really-freakin-lot.
We already had snow once this month, and around here, that pretty much does it for the month of December, but nooooooooooo...

Now, I'm not generally a narcissist, but in this case I'm gonna go ahead and state that the 18 feet inches (seriously, not an exaggeration) of life halting precipitation that was dumped on my house this weekend is due entirely to the fact that I'm hosting Christmas meals for two families in 5 days and have shopped for neither gift nor food for either.

But on the bright side, there was this:

and this:

and these guys:

And, really- what more do you need!?!

Day 20: In case you're keeping track, Day 20 looked exactly like the pictures above (mostly because the pictures used in describing Day 19's Snow-a-poloza were actually taken today. on Day 20.  The end.

1 is One...

Days 12-14 of the 25 Days (shut up, I was busy!)

I can tell this is going to be a crap post, mostly because I've been procrastinating it in a fashion befitting a LIT 201 midterm.

The weekend was great- it was the boy's birthday party, but somehow I can't get all snarky and excited about recounting it for you- except,  Ooooh.... I know!

PHOTO MONTAGE!  (niiiiiicccceee..... )

With out further ado- I give you:

Carter's First Birthday (Party- [He's not one until Wednesday- Don't rush it!])

The kid was a champ- He knew exactly what to do with the guests, the cake, and the gifts- OH, The GIFTS! It was a perfect little occasion enveloped in love.

Endless thanks to all of wonderful friends and family who joined us for this amazing milestone!

It's a "Lout Noyyyyyyse"

Day 11 of The 25 Days...

This was KILLING me today!  I think I made her say it 800 times... What are kids for, if not to endlessly entertain with their kid-like, kid-ness!?!

Happy Weekend!
See you Monday with the recap of Carter's First Birthday!!!

Cocoa Picnic

Day 10 of the "25 days of quit procrastinating and effing blog about it" extravaganza

Disclaimer: It's Christmas time.  And around here that means I get to pump my kids full of all kinds of ridiculous junk that I would otherwise avoid like the plague.  I mean, really- I'm the one that hangs out with them from the time they wake up until the moment i can no longer tolerate the whining they go to bed, so I make an effort to keep the crap food in check.  Seriously, the last thing I need in my day is a two year old all cracked out on sugar dough and hot chocolate...

That said, welcome to

The Demers Family Annual Sugar Dough and Cocoa Picnic!*

Complete with SUGAR! and Dough! and CHOCOLATE in all varieties!

*Because, secretly, I hate calm well behaved children that sleep through the night

A few notes on the above picture:

1. That is NOT a plate of meatballs despite it's meat-ball-ish-ness appearance, it is instead a very poor representation of Monkey Balls Bread
2. Please note the distressed look of longing on my poor son's face- he really, REALLY wants the meatballs
3. Sofie on the other hand really, REALLY wants to dig the soggy marshmallows out of her cocoa.  Which makes me totally want to curl up into the fetal position and rock myself...
4. Yes, the animals are wearing scarves.  Shut up.

iCovet

Day 9 of The 25 days


Without getting into it (and i promise, I will TRY get into it- SOON) I am currently hyper-focused on amateur trend spotting, and have taken WITH VIGOR! an interest in window shopping (the cyber-version, that is).
Can I just say that I can NOT GET ENOUGH of the fashion!!  Who knew there was such adorable stuff out there in the world of STORES! and SHOPPING! and GENERAL PLACES OUTSIDE OF MY HOUSE!  I.had.no.idea.


Check it:

I want to be those pictures.

Aaaakkkkkk!  I just need a million dollars.  And a personal shopper, and someone to lay my clothes out for me at night, oh, and also another someone to hold the babies while I get dressed.  And then I need some where to go.  

...too much?  I mean, the fat guy in the red suit has powers right?  

Oh.  

Nevermind.  

Photos courtesy of:

Anthropologie

Piperlime

JCrew

Banana Republic

C is for Cookie! and also Camel! (but, that last part is unrelated...)

Day 8 of the infuriatingly long 25 days of quit procrastinating and effing blog about it:

Allow me to introduce you to the best thing I've made in YEARS (not really, but they are delicious and they don't loose their minds every time I put them down for 4 seconds to go to the bathroom, so... they're certainly in contention- Do you HEAR that, son!?! ...ahem, where was I?)  Aaaaahhhh, yes:

Shortbread Stars with Cinnamon Icing:
go now. and make them.

1 cup softened butter
1/3 cup powdered sugar
1 1/2 cups all purpose flour
pinch of salt

Preheat oven to 375.  Cream together butter and sugar.  Add salt and slowly add flour to combine.  Turn dough out onto floured parchment, sprinkle with additional flour and top with another sheet of parchment.  Roll to 1/4 to 1/2 inch thickness.  Pop it in the freezer for a few minutes to stiffen the butter.  Using a small-ish cookie cutter dipped in flour, quickly cut shapes and arrange on cookie sheet.  Return uncut dough to freezer until ready to cut and bake.  Bake 7-9 minutes or until the edges start to brown

While the cookies cool make a Cinnamon Icing
Melt 1/2 cup of butter in a micowave safe dish.  Add 1/4 cup heavy cream, 2 cups of powdered sugar,  and 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon extract-beat until creamy.  Ice cool cookies with warm-ish icing- and try your hardest not to eat EVERY.SINGLE.LAST.ONE!


This Post was inspired by Evolving Mommy and her virtual Cookie Exchange.




These Cookies were inspired by Tongue-N-Cheeky and her INSANE infatuation with cinnamon extract.








This video was inspired by my dishwasher- who is endlessly grateful for a night off- thanks to the boy.

Best work party ever. (so far. (this year.))

Day 7 of the 25 days posting extravaganza-

Ah, Christmas Party Season.  It makes me feel a little bit stabby.  All the ironing, and paying babysitters, and fake smiling, and pretending you care about that really great convention in [insert lame ass city here].  bleh.  But, what are you going to do....I'm pretty sure a spouse's company holiday party falls into the "death and taxes" category.  So, Onward!

The first of many holiday soirees, for the 2009 season, was this past weekend.  What is interesting to me is that this year's parties have very nicely arranged themselves in order of reverse importance.  For example, party one was a "take it or leave it" deal from the start (if I'm being honest, I was way heavy in the "leave it" camp). I tried hard to swing things in my favor by conveniently "forgetting" to mention it to any potential sitter until the day before, but, as fate would have it, we magically ended up with not one great sitter but THREE who were willing to (nay, INSISTING ON) the drive over the river and through the snow to hang out with our babies.

So I ironed, left cash for the sitters, greased up the chompers in preparation for a nice long evening of cheek numbing grin-age, and made it almost all the way through some guy's FASCINATING story about the Spleen Doctors* convention in San Something or another** over Columbus Day Weekend*** before politely excusing myself to the bar for "ANOTHER GLASS BOTTLE OF WINE, GOOD BARTENDER, STAT!"

Please note that ~ that little squiggle right there is precisely the point in this story that my tune changes.  Because, hindsight being all that it is, I can look back and say, really, it was not.so.bad.

Here's where I'd enter all the delightful details, but I'll spare you the foreplay and get right down to it... We looked good, the food was FAB, and, you guys, WE.WON.PRIZES!

(For the record, we are not EVER the people that win stuff.  I can't say that either the hubbs or myself have ever been caller 10 on the radio, gotten the opportunity to shout "BINGO!", or picked the right pony at the track, AND I've been getting that Publishers Clearing House "You've may have already won Eleventy-Frillion Dollars" notice for decades and still? NOTHING!  But back to me putting my stilettoed heel in my mouth....)

Right, PRIZES!  I haven't even told you what they are yet, and I'm not one to look a gift horse [see also: PRIZES!] in the mouth, but this may have been one of those every-fly-chasing-daisy-picking-uncoordinated-8-year-old-who-can-put-his-jersy-on-right(and of course even those who cant!) gets-a-trophy-for-showing-up kind of situations, but wanna know what has two thumbs and doesn't mind in the least:  this girl.

In the Greatest Raffle That Ever Was, not only did I walk away with a 20lb gift basket of chocolate covered things (mmmm...chocolate-y things...) but, Patton won what may possibly be the greatest gift one could ever receive from an impartial third party (except of course for that Eleventy-Frillion Dollars): a SUBSTANTIAL gift card for a MAID SERVICE!
I know. RIGHT!! Genius Gift Giving.

So anyway, wanna know what I'm doing as soon as the masses retreat after the holidays (that's right, I said AFTER-this gift is all mine, bitches!)?  Sitting my lazy ass down with a 20lb basket of bon bons and letting somebody else take a toothbrush to the toilet bowl!
SNAP! It just got all "Real Housewives of Annandale" up in here!

oh.my.gawd.holiday.parties.rock!


___________________________
*The very boring variety of doctor has been changed to an equally boring variety of doctor to protect the anonymity of the story teller
**to my knowledge there is no such place-if I am mistaken I greatly apologize to the good citizens of San Something
***It wasn't over Columbus Day, but now that we've gotten this far, I'm not really sure it matters... so, yeah.

Snow place like home for the holidays (LAME, lame....so very very lame, SORRY)

Days 5 & 6 of the 25 days:  Snow Days!!

You guys! It SNOWED!!!

But, let me be clear, because in this area that can mean a lot of things...
When Bob Ryan calls for snow, the general expectation is for something between a slightly white-ish rain, microscopic flakes of cold that instantly disappear upon entering the atmosphere, fat wet balls of hard water that quickly turn to slush (or as I like to call it- traffic halting sign of the apocalypse), or, every 85 leap-years or so, we'll actually get two inches of packable, throwable SNOW.

Saturday we got enough of the real stuff to:
1.  Cover the trees in that awesome frosty dream-like state
2.  Make the season actually feel festive
3.  Finally motivate me to finish putting up the holiday decorations
4.  (and this is the big one!) Make an honest-to-goodness SNOWMAN*
Look at it:

*So, I obviously use the term loosely, because clearly I really mean "make an honest-to-goodness-hideous-muddy-leaf-encrusted-stuff-of-nightmares-man," but we take what we can get around here.

4 of 25 -OR- I'm starting to bore myself.

Day FOOOOOOOOUUUURRRR of the 25 days of quit procrastinating and effing blog about it.
Day ONE of bringing you absolutely NOTHING substantive and wondering what-the-mess I've gotten myself into.

But, back to ornaments (because they are simply riveting!)

I know, right!?! You HAVE to have one...

I'm thinking we'll start an etsy shop*



*Child labour laws be damned!

Ornamen-tastic!

Day Three of the 25 days, and only a whole freak-load more to go!

Today's advent activity was to make salt-dough ornaments.
It went a little something like this:

Wanna play along???  Here you go.

Salt-Dough Ornament Recipe
(a compilation of many recipes found on the great wide interweb)

2c. Flour
1c. Salt
1c. Water

Preheat oven to 250 degrees.  Mix together all ingredients in a large bowl.  When the dough begins to stiffen, kneed until smooth and moist but not sticky (add additional flour if the dough sticks to hands). Turn out onto floured work surface and roll to 1/4" thickness.  Use holiday cookie cutters to shape dough ornaments and embellish using a toothpick. Using a straw, punch out a hole at the top of each shape for stringing.  Place ornaments on an ungreased cookie sheet and bake for an hour and a half or until firm and dry, but not yet browned. Allow to cool completely before coloring or painting.  String with ribbon, hang and ENJOY!

Oooooh. This is going to be tough.

Day two of the 25 days and I'm already at a loss.
So, here. Three quick stories:

1.  Today I willfully and violently threw my 26 month old daughter in the face every child labor law ever enacted.  But listen, she's been freeloading for over two years now, and seriously, there are just things that need doing around here.  She kept whining every time I made her push the wheelbarrow, so I had her hand carry wood from the shed to the house.  It was going along swimmingly, until she tripped and smooshed her finger.  I'll set the scene:
back yard, pre-rain; <45 degrees F:
Sofie: "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! BUhu, buhuuuuh, buuhuuuuh...."
Me: What now you whiney little baby  "Oh, Honey- what happened??!?"
Sofie:  "Mama... yofie. smooshed. finger. that one." *sniff *sniff*
Me: Aaaaand what exactly would you like me to do about it  "Oooooh, sweetie, shall I kiss it and make it better?"
Sofie: "Yeaah-huh. Mama. Kiss. Yofie. Finger.  Riiighttheeeerre."  (fyi- "right there" is ALWAYS one word- it's stupidly cute)
Me: "MUAAAAH!  Now, back to work" ::pat's bottom:: "that wood's not going to stack itself."

1b.  Then I made her string the tree with lights.  BTW-I highly recommend children to anyone feeling overwhelmed by tedious house chores.  They are magical.  And by magical, I mean next to worthless- but sometimes they say cute stuff... so, there's that.

2.  Carter exhibited a new skill today- it's one of those milestones that, as a parent, you know will set the stage for his whole life to come.
...yea, clink it buddy.  Invaluable life skills, I'm telling you.

3.  I have finally made the big league, you guys!  This blog (and this humble writer) are going ALL.THE.WAY!
...well, actually, some of the way? maybe?
I just got my first solicitation from a company asking that I plug their product on this here little blog.   I'm sure they think that all 4 of you that actually read this thing would be WAY interested in their product.  But, because I totally respect your integrity, and also because I may want to use this as fodder for a post when I run out of VERY EXCITING things to tell you down the road, I'm saving the details for later... maybe.

There.  Day 2. CHECK.

25 Days of Quit Procrastinating and Effing Blog About It -or- how to effectively OVERuse the strikethrough button

::whispers::  bloggies, can you read me?  come in, over??
i don't have much time- my position has been invaded by miniature head-hunters (with fistfulls of cheerios), compromised- but this message is important...
cool, noteworthy, Some sh*t is going on in this undisclosed location.  My mission, as I choose to accept it, is as follows: Observe and (and here's the kicker) report said cool sh*t on a daily, regular basis...
I know, right?!?! Ridiculous notion, especially for someone as notoriously terrible about this whole blogging thing as I- but none-the-less a goal I'm willing to half-ass my way through, give the good old college try*, really really work toward.
I figure that by stating it here, I'll hold myself a little more accountable to you my dear readers, reader, mom.

So, on to it-

• There was a Dead, Stuffed Bird in my House Thanksgiving. It was good.  I will no longer bitch about the pants that weren't fitting, as this is no longer an issue in my life- thank you very much, second, third, 5th helping of stuffing.
• Unrelated- what's your overall opinion of SPANX??  Just asking, you know, for no reason  in particular.
• Fun Fact:  I really like setting the table.  Here, look at it.

• My children have really been pressuring me, begging me, totally disinterested in my sudden motivation to CELEBRATE THE HOLIDAY SEASON!  COUNTDOWN THE DAYS TILL CHRISTMAS!  ENJOY THE MAGIC OF THIS PARTICULAR TIME OF YEAR!... er, whatever.
• Here's the advent calendar I lovingly made for them, (who am I kidding!?!) ME!

My plan to keep this mostly daily posting thing going is to entertain, inspire, bore you to tears with the details of our daily advent activities.  You're welcome!  ...and see you tomorrow!

*Remind me to tell you about my patented definition of the "college try" (spoiler: it looks a whole lot more like trying a lot of colleges than trying hard in college)  But that is a story for another day (and lord knows there are plenty of them coming up!)

alright, you guys, you.  over and out!

On Being Busy, Having An Autumnal Blast, and Totally NOT Blogging About It

A dear friend* let me know this weekend, in not so many words, that I am not so good at keeping up with this here blog.  Well, I guess it was exactly that many words.  So, fiiiiiiiiine... that may be true, but as I said to her and I will repeat here- Um..Hello!?!?  TWO!!!! As in, 2 years old- and also- SERIOUSLY- Twooooooooo... and then you multiply that by a mobile BOY, carry the 8, add potty training, divide by the square root of squirming diaper changes and you get...Gaaaaahhhh! I need a drink.

So here it is- as I promised the lame photo montage brilliantly crafted update to recap the last...eh, I dunno, 3 months or so.  You're welcome.

I like to call the above: "Family portrait by an old-ass-rusty tractor" OR "How we Demers like to pick us some apples"

This one is entitled: "A beautiful family celebration of the day my little angel turned from sugar sweet to time-sucking, needy yet somehow simultaneously totally independent, OMG.It's.MIIIINNNNEEEEEEE... ahem, Two."

Simply: "Punkinz- at the patch, natch."

Title: "Babies need mittens on freezing days in the mountains"
-I guess this is more a note to self than a title, but it turns out that this is an important little detail to remember when packing for a fall weekend getaway. To the mountains. When it's freezing. Who knew.

Titled in song: "Old McCourtney Has a Farm, E-I-E-I-O.  And on this Farm She has the most ridiculously adorable tiny widdle animals like piggies and moo-cows and then we went to 'Boo at the Zoo' the end."

And Finally Ladies and Gentleman, I give you..."The Eight Times Multiplier"

* This one's for you, Kel. Thanks for kicking my booty- MUAH!  

A Thousand Words Thursday...."I Suck at Blogging" Edition

I don't exactly know what my problem is... maybe I find it impossible to carve out time to write a decent post these days becasuse I am:

A. Off traveling the world- exploring the far off reaches with out access to the internets (Far off reaches=OTHER neighborhood playgrounds).

B. Busy drawing up plans for world-peace (in crayon) and feeding starving children (not so much starving, as constantly hungary).

C. Wrangling Raising a Tasmanian Devil two-year-old and 9 month-old; all the while trying to maintain some semblance of sanity (not.working.)

D. Apple picking.

Yeah- We'll blame it on the apple picking...

A Thousand Words Thursday.... "I'm Not Saying I'm Clairvoyant" Edition

Seems I may have a little Nostradamus in me after all... Or, at least I'm off to a good start. (Also- Awesome New BFF would totally let me plan the wedding, 'coz she's awesome like that!!)

Ode to the Genius Bar: a thank you in Haiku

summer of iPhone

giddiness, joy, in-calling.

but then! Great Sadness...

only 12 days old.

Where have you gone fancy apps?

blank screen, blank stares... blank.

Life seems so empty.

In the hours without you...

disconnected, LOST!

AH, but there is hope.

genius abounds at Apple

I will text again!

Lady in Orange

(so sweet in understanding)

handles phone with care

And then, THERE IS LIFE!

diagnostic tests confirm

my baby is fine.

Thank you geniuses

this joyful summer: Preserved

Let's go to the pool.

A Thousand Words Thursday.... "Brace-Face" Edition

Captions:

1. If you've known me forever, the caption on this photo reads:

"Ahh HAAA! Who's the babysitter now, bee-atch!"

2. If you met me within the last 18 months, the caption reads

"I'd like to introduce you to the all new, metal-free Courtney 3.0"

3. And If we've never officially met, the caption on this photo reads

"All is right with the world. Nothing to see here. Move along. "

A Thousand Words Thursday.... "'Coz We're Rebels Like That" Edition

I can't imagine where she gets her blatant disregard for posted directives....

In case you were MISTAKENLY under the impression that I am anything less than the world's biggest dork:

I'll say it up front: I don't get out much.  (And, I mean that in about as many ways as it can be taken.)  It's not that I don't do stuff- I do alot of stuff, like dishes and diapers and grocery shopping- it's just that when I get out of the house, it is with two babies in tow, and there is generally somewhere in the vicinity ZERO adult interaction.

So imagine my giddy-ness [see also: shreeky, jumping up-and-down-ness] at the events in my life that have occurred over the last week.

Enter Wayne and Garth with the flashback: "doo-dul-lee-doo"*

________________

Scene: Last Thursday/Farmer's Market Park/Playground- As I approach the playground (eagerly scanning for potential victims, kindred spirits.... ummm... someone to talk to) I noticed a very  nice looking young mother of two, with a blanket spread out for her baby, engaging with her older son as he maneuvered the play structure.

Me: (moving more quickly, now eager to gain further intel on the subject. Should I duck behind a tree to don the camo gear, the black ninja suit, begin immediate wire tapping?  No, play this one cool- be normal.  JUST.ACT.NORMAL...)  (nonchalantly, with a smile) Hi, there."  (quick! look away!  Don't seem too interested!)

Her: "Hi."

Me: (minutes are passing- oh gawd, now what!?!... um... think, think.... oh yeah, she's got kids- me too!... that's something in common!...) "How old's this little cutie?"

Her: "He's 6 months old today."

Me: (Squeeeeeeeee!!!  JUST LIKE CARTER!!  OMFG!...) Cooly: "Oh, my son is seven months old today.  How fun!"

Her: "..." (I don't actually remember what she said here because I was too busy making us BFF's, and marrying off my daughter to her oldest son, and wondering if she'd be the type to get all up in the planning of a wedding, coz "Bee-atch, that's the M.O.B.'s job!".... wait, what?!)

Conversation continued: It was awesome, She was awesome, I was, fully and dramatically, NOT awesome.  But, conversation continued to continue, despite my social ineptitude.  Names were exchanged... Cute quips about failed mommy groups were exchanged... life stories were exchanged.... And then-We.Exchanged.Phone.Numbers!**

Me:  (clutching my phone to my chest as if it all of a sudden contained a treasure map to the land of 'Nap.time.coffee.dates.filled.with.chocolate.' )  "It was really great to meet you, Awesome New BFF!"*** (oh my gawd, now what? When do I call?  Wait a week? Two days? Now? No.. I should probably not call her until I'm at least out of sight.... akkkk, the stress....) "See you later."

Her: "Bye, Courtney!" (she used my name, *sniff*)

This week I called her- we're going to have a play-date!  EEEeeeeekkkkk.... ****

______________

*Extra points for having any idea to what I am referring... Double extra points if you can find a video clip - I could not.

** This is a seriously big deal- I mean, this is big-time mommy-friending action!  We're talking third base, people.  I was getting a little clammy... *blush*

***Names have been changed to protect the innocent

**** Dear Awesome New BFF***, If you are reading this- I am TOTALLY not one of those weird, mommy-stalking lame-o's that writes blog posts about virtual strangers.  nope. definitely not.  

_______________

BUT WAIT- THERE'S MORE:

As if all that wasn't enough awesome to fill up the whole summer (and it absolutely IS!), I was (in a totally unrelated twist of events) invited to a "Girl's Night!"

And I went!

And drank wine.

And talked about children, instead of to children.  And there were women there.  Smart, cool, 'popular-crowd'-type women who have jobs and kids and brains.  And we had conversations (containing many, many, FULL-sentences - none of which were interrupted by screaming babies with the sole mission of causing mommy-brain-melt!)

It was blissful.  I stayed out past my bedtime. And then drove myself home- IN THE DARK.  (Shut-up. It's all, you know, babies and daylight savings time, etc. ).  I'm pretty sure the invitation was a fluke- but I don't care.  It was wonderful- And now I bet they'll feel bad if they don't invite me again, so .... SCORE!!

A Thousand Words Thursday... "Gag Me" Edition

Sometimes I just can't get over this family of mine. I am so lucky.

Them There Eyes....

.

Acceptance Speech: "I'd like to thank the little people..."

This is so unexpected... 

I haven't prepared anything....  

First I'd like to thank my husband for his endless understanding of my faceblogittermomitis (look it up, it's a real thing).  Then I'd like to thank my children for the endless material...

But mostly I'd like to thank Christen over at La Vida Lista for bestowing upon me this very prestigious* blog award!  Christen, you have officially knocked my socks off!!  Thank you, Lady!

                                                                 

*okay- perhaps "prestigious" is a bit of an overstatement- but this is my big moment! I mean, with this kind of recognition I could do the impossible; become Evolving Mommy's BFF, babysit for Dooce, or even start a book club with Amalah... riiiiiiiiiiighhhhtt.  (But a girl can dream).

Anywhoo- Here's the redtape.  

1.  In accepting this award, I am to pass it along to another deserving blogger. 

 I hereby proclaim Dumb Mom at  Parenting BY Dummies to be the queen of the internet (a privilege of receiving this kick-ass award (or so I've just decided!))!  She has been rocking my world since I found her, not long ago.  Here you go, Dumb Mom!!

2.  I am, also, to tell you some interesting tidbits about myself :

•  I am a big, no -giant nerd.  I like books, and hanging out with my kids, and I think I just met a friend at the park the other day- but I'm afraid to call her.
• I want to be Donna Reed when I grow up.
• I am in no way interesting.  at all. period.
• see above.

That is all.  I am off to bask in my own awesomeness... or whatever.

VACATION FAIL 2K9 -or- How Naptime Thwarted My Vacation

The Plan: Spend a luxiourious 4 weeks in Country Club Heaven, all the while relaxing at the pool, strolling along the beach, and sipping alcohol-drenched frozed drinks with tiny little umbrellas.

The Reality: eh. not so much.

I had every intention of wisking my family away from the hustle and bustle of suburbia (ha!) for a relaxing month in sunny Florida. Arrangements had been made such that Patton would be able to "work remotley" for a week, then take a second week for vacation. I had convinced my mom to extend her stay, so that when Pat returned home to work, the babies and I could remain for another sun-filled and glorious two weeks. The mental preparation was extreme. The packing was insane.  The amount of newly purchased sun-blocking-uv-filtering-keep-my-kids-out-of-the-sun-whilst-we're-in-the-sun gear was staggering.

*Editor's Note: In the interest in keeping things brief... well-manageable... well- more novella than epic tale- I've decided to take the cheap way out and simply list the atrocities in chronological order.  This way we can all move on to more exciting things and leave this mess behind us.  You're welcome.

Vacation Fail #1: For the purpose of preserving baby schedules, we decided to begin our 10, um 12, yea THIRTEEN+ hour car trip at 11 o'clock am.  We figured this would allow for maximum nappage and night-time sleep in the car, while still allowing for activity time.  Quick math puts us at our destination well past 1am- with two babies whose schedules were NOTHING resembling preserved. Add also- setting up beds, and oh yes, getting a toddler to sleep in a completely unfamiliar place after 13 hours in the car= NOT.SO.MUCH [read: FAIL]

Vacation Fail #2: We signed Sophia up for swimming lessons (more accurately infant water survival) withISR (truely an awesome company, seriously).  Conveniently, our lessons were to start the first Monday of our vacation.  The aforementioned late night arrival was (wait for it...) actually in the wee hours of our first Monday morning.  Let's take a quick moment to talk about how toddlers, who have very limited experience with pools, and who have to be woken early, from very limited sleep after a long LOOOOONNNGGG day in the car, do not so much like to be dunked in the water by a strange lady.   This one gets filed under both Vacation Fail and Parenting Fail.  I suck. 

Vacation Fail #C:  This may be a continuation of the previous- but just for emphasis it gets it's own paragraph.  We spent the subsequent two days trying DESPERATELY to get Sofie anywhere close to the water. Not surprisingly, Sofs wanted no part of getting in the water, with anyone. period.   [Bright Side: eventually she was coaxed into the pool and ended up loving it so much that we had a hard time getting her out of the water without bribes of food and/or sleep]

Vacation Fail #the next:  {Spoiler Alert!!} Vacationing with children is not even a little bit like real vacationing. Not at all.  There was a whole lot of errand running and napping and acclimation that somehow took precedence over all of that dirty fun-having we had planned. We spent a solid three days at the beach before ever actually getting to the beach.  And just for good measure, our first ocean side "experience" was all of 20 minutes long before Carter decided it was time for a nap (foreshadowing) and NO, the beach is no place for napping- don't be ridiculous.

Vacation Fail #80frillion: Apparently, just because my son has, up to this point, been an expert 'sleeper of naps whilst out and about', does in no way suggest that he will nap at all-anywhere-but in the back room of our condo while on vacation.  FAaaaaaaIiiiiiiiiiiiiLlll....

Vacation Fail #80frillion and a half: Also, because we're having so much fun already, naps for both of my children went from a nice predictable 2 hours in the afternoon to oh.my.gawd.i.need.a.three.hour.nap.every.hour.and.a.half!

Vacation Fail #80frilion & 3/4: The three hour napping, every hour and a half, for each child was OF COURSE perfectly timed such that neither of them was awake at the same time. at all. ever*.  

Vacation Fail #80frillion and 1: As a result of the aforementioned complete lack of predictability, Patton or I spent every moment between the hours of 8a and 4p in the house (with no pool) with one sleeping baby or another.  Which subsequently meant that he and I were able to spend very little time together.  boo.  

The solution= pack it up and head on home.  We made it 12 days.

Vacation 0; Babies 1

*any photo depicting more than one child awake at a time is a result of a tireless Photoshop effort- memories people... posterity and such.